Life remains busy…in fact I told B that I feel like a candle
burning at both ends held over a fire with kids poking me with sticks between
Bishopric, work, and trying to get Oak Hollow ready for us to move in which
with two little girls can be difficult to say the least. To top it all off we just found out that our renters
will not be renewing their contract in May so add in trying to get our
Townhouse rented to the mix and it is like throwing another log on the bonfire…I
guess we can either burn ourselves out or crack out the marshmallows and enjoy
the heat! I’ll be honest; B is much
better at enjoying the moments as I run around with a flaming marshmallow on my
stick trying not to catch on fire.
This past week, although trying, became a week of answers to
me.
On Friday our youth was assigned to do baptisms for the dead
at the Bountiful Temple. I had to show
up early with the Recommend book in case anyone forgot their recommend which
usually happens. As I sat in the lobby I
decided it was the perfect time to study and read the story of Alma the older
as I had been impressed to do for months and the story kept coming up from
other people to the point I knew the Lord was trying to tell me something. As I read the story I was astounded by the
similarity of the story to my current situation in almost every detail. I read with fascination that Alma was
possibly writing this for my exact situation.
I read about how Alma under the persecution of Amulon was blessed to be
able to bear the burden placed on him until gaining deliverance but what stood
out to me was the verse Mosiah 24: 15 “…the Lord did strengthen them that they
could bear up their burdens with ease, and they did submit cheerfully and with
patience to all the will of the Lord”. I
realized that although I have been submitting to His will I haven’t been doing
so cheerfully…time to change again.
Then on Sunday I had a special moment in sacrament
meeting. As you know I have been
frustrated with work and B and I have been praying for a new job and direction
from the Lord. I have felt and have
faith that He is working on something for me and my dad gave me a blessing that
stated the same. In confidence I have
been able to move forward with faith only in time to be dragged back down into
the mire as I lose faith and question (in I’m sure a whiney voice) where the
Lord is and what I should be doing to move this whole process along. Well, let’s get back to Sunday…one of our new
members was giving a talk based on the talk “The First Great Commandment” by Elder Holland. In the talk Elder Holland discusses how many
of the twelve apostles went back to fishing after the death of the Savior
because they lost their way on the direction they should go much as I get lost
in the mire and lose faith in my own direction.
The Savior appears to these fishermen and asks Peter if he loves Him
three times to which Peter of course says yes.
This is the part that got me and I’m going to substitute my own name in
here so you understand what I was feeling as I heard this talk on Sunday. The Savior then said (in Elder Holland’s own
words) “Then [Daniel], why are you here?
Why are we back on this shore, by these same nets, having this same
conversation?” I was overwhelmed by the
spirit the moment I heard this statement as I felt the Lord was speaking
directly to me. He was stating that he
had proved himself in my past that he is working things out for my good and
continues to reassure me that he is doing so now so why then must he on a daily
basis reconfirm this for me not to lose hope.
What a sobering but needed lesson and I pray that I can do my part to
stay the course and not lose hope and faith in his efforts.
So new goal: Have
faith and remain cheerful in my assurance that the Lord is working for my good!
No comments:
Post a Comment